The Landscaper's Folly

    Once again, a beautiful Alaskan sunny day, and a good time to cut
    the overgrown grass in the yard, as I have the day off.  I put my
    headphones on, in order to hear my Spanish lessons, over the noise
    of the edge trimmer.  (Is that wrong, or am I just discovering another
    career path?  Okay, a career path.)  I fire up the weed whacker, and
    head toward the taller grass on the knoll by the fence, only to
    encounter something more unbelievable than JFK's second gunman.  
    It was a steaming pile of dog poop at the base of the 1.5 foot tall
    patch of grass.  Too late, because it just sprayed all over my legs,
    glasses, and probably in my hair, like it was an ad for a late-night
    TV juicer.

    My Dad always said, "And Keep your mouth shut!"  Well, now it
    was finally applicable.   And who Sh!ts in the tall grass, other than
    lions and snipers?  You would think that it would tickle.

    History repeats itself, so I press onward.  At that point, I just don't
    care anymore, because I know that the Lady selling makeup walking
    by, ain't coming through La Puerta anytime soon, after watching my
    scent sense.  At least I was wearing a shirt, because I don't look like
    Hugh Jackman.  I feel more like a scarecrow, soiled by birds, named
    Jack Human.  I am also thankful that I was wearing clean underwear.

    From the fallout,

    Juan Guano

    "Live each day as if it was your laughs."  -  -  R. Machismo
Alaska Original Humor Sample Book for TouristsLaughs by Author Mark Sanders
A Funny Mystery in Juneau Alaska Clean Humor of Mark Sanders
Sample of Chapter 14)  Alaska